[Fsfe-ie] Final Draft

Ben North ben at redfrontdoor.org
Mon Dec 15 13:25:36 CET 2003

Malcolm and others,

I think your final-draft letter reads very well and gets our points
across clearly.  Many thanks for putting it together.

> To whom it may concern,

Should we maybe write to Tony McGrath?  I don't know whether it would be
better to put someone's name on the top.

My only other point would be that perhaps we could move the sentence

> We realise that the government is under pressure to implement this new
> legislation and we thank you for making a draft available for comment.

to the very start of the letter?  Just to start off on a positive note
with respect to the work they've done in making the draft and writing
the explanatory notes.  Maybe add "add explanatory notes" between
"making a draft" and "available for comment".

> If you are happy, please send:
> * Your name

Ben North (that is my full as-on-passport name).

Since this is definitely my opinion and probably not that of my
employer, I'd prefer job/employer not to be included.



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